Being a college student is hard. Balancing school and life can be terrifying and stressful. You may be a graduate student, struggling with balancing your post-graduate degree and learning how to be an “adult”. You may be a freshman trying your best to adjust to a new atmosphere. Perhaps you are a PhD. candidate raising a child and doing your research. Maybe you are even a parent worrying about your child’s mental health while they are miles away at school. No matter who you are, what age you are, or what you are going through, we all have something in common here. You or somebody you care about is having a rough time at university.
I understand your struggle. I do. My freshman year, somebody I love and was extremely close to went through a traumatic experience. It tore me apart watching them struggle with their traumas. I then went through my own struggles. The toll of supporting my loved ones emotionally, trying to figure out who I was as a person, and balancing a whole new culture and environment wrecked me. I struggled with figuring out healthy ways to cope and deal with what I was feeling. I thought I knew how to cope, but boy was I wrong! As more things started to pile up, the less I felt like a person.
Its Okay to Know You’re Not Okay
I remember one day me and my roommate were sitting in the Purdue Memorial Union, eating dinner. I looked at her and broke down crying. I couldn’t do this anymore. Everything felt like it had come crashing down around me. I felt as if I was focusing on all the wrong things and had never felt so lost in life. But I couldn’t even pinpoint what was wrong! When anybody asked me why I was upset, I couldn’t find the words for it. It was like a deep sadness had taken over my life, and I had no idea how to combat that. She looked me in the eyes and said “Jess, have you tried therapy at all?”
No, I had never tried therapy. I didn’t think I was going through something hard enough to consider it. In my head, therapy was exclusively for people who went through extensive trauma or terrible hardships, and I always thought it would be a waste of my time and the therapist’s time to deal with my struggles. I never thought they were big enough to get help.
But here’s the thing. You can go to therapy for anything. Counselors, social workers, licensed mental health therapists, anyone who has sought training to counsel people through their hardships all want to help you. No matter your struggle, there is somebody out there who can relate to you and help you manage life’s struggles. At that point, somebody who cared about me pointed out I was struggling, and that I didn’t have to feel like this
But I Have Support Already!
It never feels good to hide things and keep them bottled up. Yes, you can talk to your family and friends about your struggles, you can use healthy coping mechanisms, and you can work through things in your head. If that is what has been working for you, that’s fantastic! But if it ever becomes too much for you, you are not out of options. The best part of therapy is that therapists are specifically trained to give you tools and help you work through struggles. They can provide insight and techniques that maybe your friends and family don’t know of. They also have to keep everything confidential, and cannot discuss their clients with anybody. If you have been keeping things inside out of fear of being judged, ridiculed, or reprimanded, a therapist is a great resource to turn to because they are a fresh perspective that won’t tell anybody about your struggles.
When I went home for the summer after freshman year, I was still hesitant about therapy. But one day, I was laying in my bed and felt awful. I couldn’t hold my troubles inside anymore. I broke the news to my family that I was not okay, and I wanted to seek help. They were extremely supportive of my decision and helped me find a therapist who could help me. Now, did this specific therapist solve all of my problems? No. But did she give me tools to manage my anxieties and experiences on my own? Yes! Did I never go to therapy again after that? No. Life has a way of surprising you with good and bad when you are least expecting it. But now I was a student deep into my undergraduate academic career. My junior year I was going through an extreme rough patch. Between balancing school, anxious thoughts, and hard feelings, I wasn’t able to handle it on my own anymore. During my time here, I have met with two amazing counselors near Purdue who were able to help me learn techniques I could do whilst balancing academics. They understood how it was being a struggling college student, and that meant the world to me.
Making The Decision
If you are seeking help at or near a college campus, the odds that a therapist near you works and is great with students is high. A lot of mental health counselors near campuses actually specialize in student life! They are equipped with all of the tools you need to get back on track. Here at Counseling Simplified, we have many skilled, friendly and wonderful counselors who are happy to help. If you are interested in booking an appointment, give us a call at (765)-637-4884 or email admin@counselingsimplified.com to get started. We can get you matched to a therapist who best suits your needs.
Looking back on my four years at Purdue, my only regret is not seeking therapy sooner. I think my academic experience would’ve been greater if I had sought help to manage my stressors. I would’ve made better decisions and would’ve had an increased quality of life. If you are hesitant to seek therapy, I would advise you to give it a shot. From undergraduate studies to PhD. dissertations, a professional can help you become the best version of yourself.
Written By Jessica Kobrick, Intern
Jessica is an Undergraduate Intern at Counseling Simplified in West Lafayette. She is currently an undergraduate at Purdue, studying psychology, human sciences, and family development.